


Home

by amcwrites



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: F/M, it's my first work in forever, pls pardon me, tw// panic attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 08:37:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11665509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amcwrites/pseuds/amcwrites
Summary: All the stress is getting to you, but you find solace in a certain boy.





	Home

**Author's Note:**

> This is really short, but I'm proud of it. Please give me some love ;-;

You were in your dorm trying to breathe. Everything was too much for you lately. It felt like your entire world was crashing down. The tears escaped your eyes faster than you could stop them. Your chest felt tight and every gulp of breath you took didn’t feel like it was enough. What could you do? You were trying your best, but it wasn’t enough. They kept asking more and more from you. The pressure was too much. You didn’t ask to be one of the best composers in the industry. You loved what you did, yes, but it was starting to feel like a chore. The passion you once had was slowly fading.

“(Y/N), open the door! Please!” One of your members was banging on the door. You suspected that they were all there, anxiously waiting for you to let one of them comfort you. They had no choice, but to beg for you to unlock the door since all the keys to your room, including your manager’s spare, was currently sitting on top of your dresser.

You didn’t answer them. You’ve been ignoring them for the past 30 minutes. You didn’t know when they’d stop. It would take all of your being to open that door. If you even took just a look at them, you’d just feel worse. They were reminders of the life you were living right now. You’d break if you saw them. It wasn’t that you didn’t love them. You appreciated them, but all your hardships were associated with them and it was more than you could handle.

So, there you lied, in the middle of you bed, a pillow clutched to your chest and racking sobs that you felt through your whole body. You were choking on the air you breathed. Even breathing was taking a toll on your body. You weren’t sure how much longer you could go on. You were where you wanted to get in life, but what sacrifices did you have to make to be where you are? And where you are was thousands of miles away from home, everyone you loved, and all the things you were familiar with. Why did you take this journey anyway? You knew what costs you’d have to pay. Literally and figuratively. You could’ve spared your family, especially your mom, from worrying about you. You thought about how short your conversations with your family were as you were too caught up in the whirlwind of South Korea. You knew you could do more to ease the mind of your mom. You thought about how much easier your life would have been if you had just stayed, but also how boring and lifeless your world would be if you hadn’t. All these thoughts ran through your mind. There was never a second to spare in your racing mind. The good and the not-so-great things, they were all there. You chose this. No matter what you felt, you had to go on. You were too far gone in your dream to turn back now. Not when there are thousands of people supporting you.

The lull of sleep didn’t come as you expected. Instead, you sat with you back again the wall, pillow still clutched to your chest and took a look at your surroundings.

On the other side of the room was a single bed similar to the one you were on now. Though the room was dark, you could still somewhat make out the crème color of the walls that was littered with post it notes or little drawings you and your roommate made. You both had one drawer, yours was the one by the foot of your bed while hers was the one in between the two beds. It wasn’t much, but you weren’t in this room too much anyway.

Hours seemed to pass as you stared at the wall opposite from you. The tears that ran down your face seemed to have dried. However, the aching in your heart seemed to go on and you felt another wave of sadness rush over you. You wanted so badly to be okay, to be able to handle everything that was thrown at you, but you also needed a break. The stress was too much for you to handle. Too many people expecting too much from you. How you were going to deal with the pain, you had no idea.

Your thoughts were interrupted when you heard a knock on your door different from the ones you heard before. It was softer and had less of a demanding tone to it. It was followed by a quiet voice saying, “Hey. Can you please open the door? It’s me.”

They didn’t need to say who they were. You knew that voice anywhere.

With a sharp intake of breath, you reluctantly slid off your bed and shuffled into your slippers. As you got to the door, you hesitated opening it. The person on the other side seemed to have sensed your presence near the door and spoke again, “It’s just going to be me, I promise. I just want to make sure you’re okay. I’ll leave you alone after if you need me to.” How were you to say no to him?

You cracked the door open slightly and peeked out. There he was, standing there alone in pajama pants and his hands hidden in the pocket of his hoodie, even so looking like someone you could only see in your dreams. He was looking at you expectantly, but you made no move to open the door and kept staring at the blonde cutie in front of you. You knew once you let him in, you wouldn’t be able to control your emotions again and burst into tears. There was almost nothing you could keep from him.

“Are you going to let me in?” He smiled warmly at you, but you could see the concern in his eyes. You nodded and opened the door more so that he could step inside.

“So,” he started, but as soon as you shut the door, you clung to him and, as you thought, burst into tears you did.

He held you tight against his chest, letting you release all your emotions. His hand was rubbing your back soothingly, while his head was over yours as he kissed your temple, whispering words of “It’s okay. You’re going to be fine.” and shushing you. You two stood there for a few moments before he was leading you to the bed where you ended up in a cuddling position, you still wrecking sob after sob. You stayed there like that, just clutching onto Jaehyun as he tried to calm you. You wouldn’t say it out loud, but even his simple presence was enough to put a rest to your running mind. This wasn’t one of those times, though. You needed to vent out all those emotions you’ve been bottling up for months and he gladly let you do so.

When you had finally stopped crying, you kept the position you were in. His arms were wrapped around your shoulder as your head lay on his shoulder, buried in his hoodie and your arm draped across his waist. It was a comfortable position, but you weren’t sure if the weight of your head had his shoulder going numb, so you shifted a bit. He kept you in place, not wanting to lose the feeling of you in his arms. You weren’t complaining. Jaehyun felt like a personal heater. His warmth was comforting.

He started to sing softly and you closed your eyes, a small smile finally making its way to your face for the first time that night. It felt like all your worries were slipping away. That’s what it felt like being next to this boy. His voice would never fail to make you melt into a pile of mush. One of your favorite things to listen to was the sweet sound of his voice. It sounded like honey was dripping off every syllable he sang. You pulled him closer to you and looked up at him. You noticed he stopped singing when he felt the slight movement of you hear. He turned to you and placed a soft kiss to your temple that had your eyes fluttering at the action then looked up at the ceiling again. His melodic voice started filling in the silence of the small room again.

You analyzed the softness of his features like you have a thousand times before and wonder how even though you felt everything in your life was wrong, there was still him. The boy with the voice like an angel’s, with a heart full of too much love. He was caring and willing to put his family before anything else. A boy with a drop dead gorgeous smile that had you weak at the knees every time. It was all Jaehyun. You knew no material thing nor anyone could compare to him and how much he meant to you.

All your thoughts of leaving everything and running back home disappeared, because he was here. He felt like home and there was no other way to describe it.


End file.
